Impossibly Possible

SO to begin my amazing tale of fate and the disposition that has lead me here to this day, starts its beginnings in the lovely city of Tampa. (cue the dream-like waves, fade out and fog in). May 2010 - I've come to the conclusion that I've been with my boyfriend for a year and 4 months off and on (2 times off) and through a comment made from a friend lead to the thought of living together. "are you and Jeremy living together yet, you've been together awhile already?".. this didn't make me think of anything at first.. but then the next day however.. thinking like a romantic spontaneous person I am.. and yes I really am, I thought to myself why not.. we haven't been able to do things as a couple we've really wanted to do and with living together we could save money and do the things we always wanted, it was a perfect and unflawed idea.. who wouldn't want to save money and spend it on their spouse? I ran the idea across to him and it didn't really seem no surprise to me that he was more than happy with the request.. This was our chance to take the next step and to feel out how we work living together, of course we agreed this would be a trial basis and if it doesn't work out I'd move into my own apartment again no harm no foul. Well 2 weeks later I move out of my apartment, and was able to get away with not paying the last months rent and getting back my full $400 deposit. At this time we have already found an apartment and I put $150 deposit nonrefundable down and also by this time I've been living with him for two weeks. So here is where fate sends a bitch slap from the cosmos and sends me into a confuckted spiral downward. Wed. May 26 2010 - I get a call from the leasing officer of our new apartment saying we got the apartment we wanted, but in fact it was bigger, third floor, screened in balcony and cheaper.. so I said hell yes take it off the market, we'll take it.. it couldn't have been more of a comforting feeling.. of course until I get home and tell my boyfriend. So i get home to tell him the news.. he was not as thrilled as I thought. Turns out, he doesn't want to live together after all.. Of course I felt betrayed and abandoned. He told me "he still wanted to be together".. oh ok..  so you leave with everything in tact and I'm left robbed and broken, its perfectly fine.. suuuree. Well rewind to a back story.. So I have this best friend Ryan, who was dating this boy Mike, in the time they were dating me and my boyfriend Jeremy had made friends with Mike and his Sister. Well, Mike and Ryan had planned to go to this thing in Alabama called Bamajam, basically its like Woodstock for rednecks. Well about a 3 weeks to a month later they break up. Fast forward a week before Jeremy says he doesn't want to live together. So I'm sitting in bed when Jeremy asks me, Mikes sister invited me to go to Bamajam should I go.. I told him I wouldn't go cause that was something our friend Ryan had planned to do with Mike and that it would seem like you are trying to replace him and by doing so make him feel back stabbed.. fast forward the day after the breakup - I get a call at work from a very Heated Ryan "JJ..do you know Jeremy is at Bamajam with mike?" Well I was a bit shocked to say the least, especially after I advised him not to go and since he broke up with me the day before.. I could see how heart broken Jeremy was from all the Facebook pictures he posted. I mean at least ask your friend Ryan if its cool to take his place to go with his ex.. don't be a coward and go behind his back.. Ryan is still waiting for an apology, I don't see it coming really, Jeremy has been a bit selfish and inconsiderate, so why would he feel he did anything wrong. Meanwhile.. in the time of this whole betrayal I was trying to get my old apartment back.. by the grace of a good friend I was able to get a loan to pay for the deposit and first month.. Only was it then fate would again send me down a different path. So the week I decide to get my old apartment back, Shirly my old landlord happened to have a collapse that weekend.. ok lemme tell you Shirly is a spitfire ox, Ive never seen her sick.. she's always around so when I came 3 days in a row knocking at her door with no response I was a little worried, I thought she may have died in her apartment, thats when I found out she was in the hospital and they're not renting the apartments out till she gets better or the land owners get back from vacation... So I decided that was just another sign to move on to something else.. I gave the loan back to my friend, which was a good idea because I had in writing that I was paying him back in 2 weeks. Well.. heres comes another twist of fate.. It just so happened the week I was supposed to pay back this loan to my friend.. my check had bounced from work leaving me negative $600 dollars in my account.. so in fact if I waited for Shirly to get better took the apartment and kept the loan, I would haven't been able to pay it back, cause of my work check bouncing.. Also hearing my job might not be open after summer only made me think that even if all things worked out, Shirly never collapsed, I kept the loan and, got my apartment back, my work check had never bounced, I may have been outta a job 3 months later because they may be potentially closing and again be homeless. I mean all these things happen so perfectly one thing after another I just felt like I was being sent home to Bradenton for a reason.. So this is my last week here in Tampa and cant wait for this month to end and cant wait to start my life over again back home.  So that is my life as is currently.. I just needed to catch you up before starting anew in Bradenton, the trials and tribulations that lead me here, the back story of it all, now I can finally move forward and on to greener pastures. Through all this, I've learned never to fly to close to the sun and that some ambitions can be too much for some people to handle.. never anticipate anything.. cause you might get hurt but instead become resilient from what you learned.